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Have you ever wondered what your sexual self would look like without the constraints of gender?
What might arousal be like if you could undo some of those pesky gendered associations?
How might gentle curiosity create space for embodied learning about your own unique sexuality?
This sensational two day workshop experience is led by H Howitt, assisted by Amanda Gay Love and proudly produced by Queer Hearted.
We aim to create a safe, loving and compassionate container for people of all genders, body types, identities, and with any degree of prior experience to explore.
Sex is largely presented to us as intrinsically linked to both our genitals, and subsequently, our gender. Once we unpick the misconception that genitals = gender, what building blocks are we left with to construct our sexualities? Often, both the bits in our pants, and the things we might do to get off, are still defined by performative, gendered norms, shaped by both the rules we adopt, as well as the ones we reject.
This can create some tricky terrain, particularly for us queers. So, what would our sexual selves look like if we built from a place beyond gender? If we learnt simple practises that helped us to engage sexually, not despite our queer bodies, but because of their wonderful, binary-busting potential?
On day one, we take a look at some of the ways we unconsciously gender ourselves, our lovers and our bodies, and how this can throw up difficulties in our sex lives. We use group discussion to pinpoint the ways in which gender has impacted the way we have sex, and the ways we see our sexual selves. We’ll explore ways that we might connect with sexuality beyond gender, and explore what our sex lives might look like if we used gender consciously, from a place of reverence, like we do with power in BDSM. The activities will be 'pants-on' for the first day, using breath, intention, and meditation techniques, both in solo, paired and group exercises.
On day two, we will consciously explore our own bodies in a solo way, using breath and genital touch. Although this exercise is designed with genitals in mind, incorporation of other body parts is welcomed. Through this process we will rewrite our own unique manuals to our erotic selves. There will then be an opportunity to share what you have discovered with others, before we invite consensual touch from another – practising both giving and receiving embodied touch. This day will involve optional 'pants off' exercises.
*Safer sex protocols will be followed, and all parts of the workshop will be negotiated with safety and consent at it’s core.
**In this workshop, 'genitals' refers to all and any bits in your pants, from front to back, flesh or otherwise, grown yourself or not! You will be encouraged to incorporate only the bits you want to!
Please be in touch if you would like to attend
but lack the funds to do so.
The space welcomes LGBTQIA*, sex workers, POC and people with disabilities. Please inquire about access needs.
H is a non-binary, trans identified, queer sex worker, educator and porn performer. They are passionate about equipping people with skills and language to access pleasure and intimacy. H teaches from a sex-critical, intersectional perspective, that embraces our varied, plural and complex relationships with sex and our bodies; they believe that the cornerstones of this work are embodied curiosity, mindfulness and self-compassion, rather than tips 'n' tricks for 'good sex' (though that might be a side-effect!). The workshops they offer are ideal for gender non-conforming, non-binary, trans* and queer folk, and for anyone navigating queer or marginalised bodies - their own or others.
H has been fortunate enough to train with some of the pioneers of queer, conscious sexuality. They discovered the joyous intersection of kink and spirituality, tantra and BDSM, from a non-binary perspective, under the watchful eye of Dossie Easton, Lee Harrington, Barbara Carellas and Janet Hardy.